Together We Are Better

I'm pondering the world events that are and have taken place over the last few months; from rallies, to protests, to natural disasters. I am thinking about all the notifications that have popped up on my phone telling me when another bombing has happened. And then I think about all the news reports and headlines about what this politician has done and what that politician has said. So many pointed fingers that have stirred up so many arguments and debates. I don't understand it all, and I'm not even going to try. But I think there is a lesson for humanity in it all and I want to dig into it a bit.

I grew up in the same area where I was born. We never really left the borders of where we lived, where our church was, my grandparent's house, and the grocery store. But when I was 14 I had the opportunity to go on my first missions trip to the country of El Salvador. As I prepared for my trip I had no concept of what it would be like, not just the scenery but the people, the culture, and the atmosphere. I had never traveled so I didn't have a basis to form conclusions. I left American soil with a very narrow outlook.

When we arrived my eyes were quickly opened wide within minutes of stepping off the plane. I could feel so much hurting, poverty, and discord. I think back to our first conversations with the missionaries and their warnings for us to not look people on the streets in the eyes because it would entice a challenge; or that hand gestures we as Americans thought of as friendly waves actually representing calls for prostitutes there. My mind was blown. How could so much strife exist so plainly, I thought. But then the information continued. We learned of battles between neighborhoods, the Guerrillas against the military, and even battles between the Catholics and Protestants. On top of all of that, the country had suffered thousands, not just one or two, THOUSANDS of earth quakes in the beginning of the year. Leaving the already unstable country in shambles. At one point while we were on our bus we had military men with automatic rifles jump on to offer "protection" from the neighborhood we were driving through. 

At 14, that is a lot of information and activity to process through. I was having a hard time looking at the people as people and not just seeing situations. But then we held our first ministry service. And my perspective cleared up a bit. The foggy precepts faded to the sides as I watched hurting people unite together in the presence of the Lord. I watched them serve each other food, hold each other as they cried, and literally lift each others arms up in worship. I remember thinking how amazing it was that all of this craziness was going on around them and yet they gathered together and hope was shining bright. To me that says unity enables hope. It was when they were together for the same purpose, to reach the same goal that unity overcame the heaviness of the it all.

If we stop and look back at Jesus' time here on the earth we can see that He knew the necessity of unity, being together. He is the Lord and He still chose to gather with His disciples to change this world. He didn't just choose to be around the people who talked most like Him, or the ones who looked like Him. He chose to encounter men and women of all kinds... because their differences did not negate that they were people who needed love.

"How wonderful and pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity!"

 Psalm 133:1

About a month after I got back from El Salvador 9/11 happened and my theory was proven. I watched as our country stopped the politics, stopped the finger pointing, stopped the words filled with hate, and in place of all that junk they loved each other, they fought for each other, they were unified. In times of real struggles, people will come together. 

And when I reflect back to where our country currently stands it proves my theory all over again. Yes, there are not so wholesome, and some down right inhumane things happening in our nation. There are some people who's ideologies and perceptions of the world are completely out of whack, with extremism on each side. There are politics that we do not agree on, and there are politicians we do not like. BUT, when we have groups of people, from every background, gathering together in Texas at this very moment to save as many people as possible in a natural disaster, it says something. People driving from thousands of miles away to bring their boats to rescue those stuck in the floods. People sending clothes, food and money to help offer some hope. Not caring what color, shape, size, sex, or age they are. They are united together and it is creating an aroma of hope.

So I think my point in writing all this is to say: when the flood waters fade back from Texas, and the world returns to a (semi) normal state, people are still going to be people. We will disagree at times; we will all have our own ways of thinking. But I urge you, to not let your perspective narrow. Remind yourself daily, maybe even hourly, that our differences and disagreements don't matter when it comes to the important stuff, and it shouldn't take us waiting till the next natural disaster to recognize it. If we will just take the time to love each other past all of that, unity will happen and hope will be stirred. We aren't too far gone, and we can still accomplish so much together! And together we are a better country, family, friend, neighbor, person!

Where Will My Help Come From?

In the past few months I have been going through a transformation of mind, or maybe I should say a renewing. You see, my whole life I have been someone who would fight for what I thought was right, or just. It really irked me all the way to the core when someone would say something false about someone, anyone. I would be quick to correct them and let them know it wasn't ok. It's this justice thing inside of me.

But lately... the Lord started speaking to me about me allowing Him to fight my battles: "The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to be silent. (Exodus 14:14)" Silent?!?! Do you know how hard it is for me to be silent? ESPECIALLY if someone is not acting justly! At first this lesson seemed hard. How was I going to be able to just not speak my mind in situations that I felt deserved it? How would I be able to sit by idly and let things happen? But the Lord is faithful... if He is going to take us through a lesson, there will be grace for us to learn through it.

It started off with smaller things, someone would say something and I would be quick to want to speak but the still small voice of the Lord would be quick to remind me, "I've got this battle!" Then some bigger things happened, to the point where I scheduled meetings to address them, and the Lord reminded me: "I will fight this battle, let Me be the implementer of justice!" And so I cancelled meetings to be obedient to what the Lord was teaching me.

And then something big happened. A situation that took my breath away... literally. Something that in my heart was not justified. And it hurt. And it confused me. But most of all, it made me want to stand up for myself. I wanted to come against every negative thing that had been said against me. But in the midst of it, I could feel the presence of the Lord. I could hear His voice saying: "Let Me justify you!" So I am.

Was it easy to not fight? No! Did I ask questions? Definitely. Did I get emotional and shed tears? FOR SURE! I think this scenario was one of the hardest things I've been through, outside of my health. But can I just say again how faithful the Lord is? Because He is so good.This whole time He knew these situations were coming and though my mind and emotions felt blown away and confused, my heart knew the Lord was at work.

I love how He began to prepare me to not fight. He started teaching me months ago in little things to let Him have it. So when I reached this pinnacle moment, my heart was already ready to let Him take the reigns. Like I said previously, just because my heart was prepared doesn't mean it was an easy thing. But what it does mean is that I can focus on the Lord filling me up instead of focussing on having to prove myself to those around me.

This scripture comes to mind today: "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly. (John 10:10)" Instead of letting myself be robbed by the enemy and his schemes, I get to be full of the abundant life the Lord has for me. I get to trust that His plan is already at work because I have given my life over to His hands.

I just want to encourage you if you're reading this: Sometimes this world and the people in it will smack us around, but our hope does not lie in them, our hope lies in the Lord. And when we place our lives (hurts, fears and joys) into His hands, we can trust that we will prosper (Jeremiah 29:11) and He will work all things out for our good (Romans 8:28).

My journey isn't over, I've still got many lessons to learn along the way I'm sure. But one thing is certain, I have learned that letting God fight for me is way more beneficial for me and the people around me!

Here's To Health

Many of you read my update a couple of months ago about my health journey over the last couple of years. I wanted to take some time to post a second update and then share some exciting things that are on the horizon in this season of my life. So here we go...

First, I just want to let you know that God is good. I am amazed at His faithfulness, provision and that He still speaks to us. Though He is mighty and the King of Kings, He still wants to just love on us and bless us. He's just so good!

With that being said, if you will recall from my last health update blog (A Journey None the Less), my migraines are gone! Haven't had an episode since those darn teeth came out! And the next part to my healing process was to "figure out" a solution for the pain coming from the cysts continually growing on my ovaries and then bursting. I'm not going to lie, there were a couple of times, even after the Lord did amazing things to help rid me of the migraines, that I felt like the cramping would never go away and hope left my heart. But, like I said before, HE IS FAITHFUL!

I gave up on my doctors because they kept telling me there was nothing they could do and I was tired of going to appointments every week for no reason. So I prayed. And I prayed. And then I had an epiphany (which really was a word from the Lord). I was laying on the couch taking a nap when out of no where I started cramping horribly. I wish I could truly describe the pain it caused when the cysts would burst, but the best way I can try is to say it felt similar to what I would assume a horse with needles attached to it's hooves jumping up and down on the insides of my body would feel like. It's rough!

So as I was trying to find a sitting or laying position to get some relief or comfort I had a thought (the epiphany or word from the Lord)... "what was going on in my life when the cramping started?"

I had never, in this entire process or season, thought about this. And as soon as I thought it I felt hope stir in my heart. I could feel a life changing moment about to happen. So I thought about the timeline (which is not an easy task when you're in pain) and I prayed and asked the Lord to direct my thought process. And I realized that around the time these issues started I had stopped taking a supplement I had been taking to deal with a gall bladder issue. You see I had been taking Magnesium everyday (with some apple sauce) for months and when the gall bladder issue was resolved I decided to stop taking the magnesium. Within a month's time the cramping started.

When I realized there could be a correlation there you better believe I picked up the lap top and started googling the effects of a lack of magnesium on women's health. SO MANY ARTICLES described the necessity of magnesium in women! I could not even believe that yet again it might just be that easy! I clicked over to amazon real quick and ordered some magnesium!

Another thing that was sticking out in the articles was the importance of vitamin D in women's health. I'll spare you the details of what it helps with, but let's just say it helps things flow. And with the knowledge from my doctors having tested my vitamin D several times and explaining that it was almost non existent in my body, I went ahead and ordered some of that as well. I think at this moment I probably cried because in my heart I felt like this was my solution.

I started taking the supplements as soon as they came and within 2 weeks the cramping had subsided. I waited for my next cycle to see what would happen, and described to close friends that I felt like I was kind of walking on egg shells with this process; I didn't want to get too excited and then it fail but I also wanted to rejoice over every little victory. When my cycle came, I cramped but I could feel the difference! This was normal. This was how my body was supposed to be responding. I was nervously waiting for the last day so I could see what would happen next, and praise the Lord, there was no cramping. It has now been a couple of months without unnecessary cramps and I just feel so grateful!

You see, God is still our healer! He may use divine, miraculous healing, or doctors and medicine, or He may just give us wisdom and direction in steps to take to allow healing to happen! But I am so grateful that through this whole process I know He never left me, even when my hope was low. And now I not only get to praise Him for the healing, but I get to share with ladies all the time about what the Lord did for me and offer them a little sliver of hope!

Now I am here, in a new season. And this season is proving to be one of MUCH fruit. Ministry opportunities are popping up all around me and things that I have prayed and fasted for are beginning to bud. I have the opportunity to go back to South Africa in October and I cannot wait for that! My heart loves that country and its people so much. And along side of that, I get to step in to some evangelism around Northern Cal / Nevada with a team of people who long to see the Lord made famous! It's incredible!

Had you asked me a year ago if I thought I'd be at this place in my life right now, I would have laughed at you and then cried. Because I have longed for this for so long, but I could not see past my circumstances. Thankfully I serve and love a God who sees that whole picture where I can only see bits and pieces. He's amazing!

And I just want to say, if you were one of those people who prayed with me, cried with me or encouraged me at all along this path... THANK YOU! There were days when I did not know what was carrying me through, but now that I look back I am certain it was you and your prayers. And with that, this is not just a victory in my life, but also a victory in yours!

So here's to health! Here's to new seasons! And here's to living a life of faith!

Who Knows...

When it comes to decision making, I'm generally pretty quick to decide. I use my logical brain to quickly weigh the pros and cons, considering how the effects of my decision may possibly change my daily routine or my relationship or whatever the decision pertains to. And I believe that God created us with brains so we could use common sense to make decisions. But I also believe there is a flip side to that sentiment, that sometimes there are choices to be made that require us to not be logical in our earthly minds but to operate in a mindset of faith.

I have heard story after story in the last couple of months of people who had the choice to follow the leading of the Lord. Some allowed fear to keep them from following through and some let their faith lead the way. And there is a common theme that keeps coming up when they share: "WHO KNOWS what will come out of it?", "WHO KNOWS what obedience will produce?" You see, the Lord doesn't ask us to understand what the outcome may be, He just asks us to obey.

I think of the stories in the Bible where ordinary men said yes to extra-ordinary tasks because, even if they didn't understand or couldn't see the outcome, they trusted that God's ways are higher than our ways. I think of David, Joseph, Moses, and Paul... saying yes and probably in the back of their minds wondering what would come of it all. I look at their example to trust and walk in faith, which is not as easy to do as it is to say. 

So tonight, I am encouraged! I am encouraged to think ANYTHING is possible. I am encouraged to say more yeses and to step out in faith and obedience often. I am encouraged to trust the Lord with my path and to think often: "Who knows what could be?!?!"

Because of of this decision, tonight I get to step out and share with you that the Lord has plans for me! So many opened doors being flung wide! One that I am especially excited to share is coming in October of this year! I will be venturing back to South Africa with the wonderful McGregors. The Lord has confirmed time and time again that this trip is something He has for me to step in to, and who knows, the bigger picture could be even greater than I can imagine.

Please partner with me in prayer over this trip and season in my life. And if you happened to be inclined to give or would like to find out more information, please visit the link below. 

Could you imagine what the Lord could do if we all could just put ourselves aside and trust Him enough to say yes? Who knows?!!? ;) 

Click Here For More Info On South Africa 2017

Walking Down a Road Less Traveled

On August 28, 1963 at the Lincoln Memorial in Washington D.C., an infamous moment in history took place. This moment is not only known by every American, but by people around the world. A man, humbled and filled with love, spoke words that would penetrate the very core of our country. They went like this:

"I have a dream today ... I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted , hill and mountain shall be made low. 'l'he rough places will be made plain, and the crooked places will be made straight. And the glory of the Lord shall be revealed, and all flesh shall see it together. This is our hope. This is the faith that I go back to the South with. With this faith we will be able  to hew out of the mountain of despair a stone of hope. With this faith we will he able to transform the jangling discords of our nation into a beautiful symphony of brotherhood. With this faith we will be able to work together, to pray together, to struggle together, to go to jail together, to stand up for freedom together, knowing that we will be free one day." ~ Reverend Martin Luther King, Jr. 

(See whole speech at: https://www.archives.gov/files/press/exhibits/dream-speech.pdf)

A man that exuded justice from his veins, his very heartbeat being that of love,  and humility encasing him led a generation (and many more to follow) down a road less traveled. Knowing that pain would be around every corner, that others may try to soil his name and reputation, he chose to move forward without looking back. Things have never been and will never be the same because of it.

Well, MLK, today I have a dream.I have a dream of a world filled with love and purity. I dream of a world where children live in homes with both of their parents. Where parents lead there homes in wisdom and love. That our homes would become places where the presence of the Lord dwells, and thus true freedom reigns. I dream of this world being turned upside down simply because men and women fight for righteous and pure marriages... a holy and sacred union. That easy road that says "give up", "things will never change" or "I can't fix it" would be erased from the mouths of people around the world. It is a hard road to fight for what is right, in love and yet hold the standards high. But, I believe to see change it must start here... placing our Heavenly Father in the center of home and marriage.

You see, I believe that if a child is brought up in love that they will walk in love. Proverbs 22:6 tells us that if we train our children in the way they should go, when they are old they will not veer from it. And I cling to that! If we want to see all the horrible things in this world end, we need to train our children. Not only in word but even more so in action.

I am not oblivious to the fact that this world will never be perfect, because I have read the end of my Bible. What I do stand on though, if we want to see change it has to start with us, in our homes, in our families. We cannot preach one thing to the world and then idly sit by as our homes are torn apart with greed, slander, impurities, bitterness and the list could go on.

So Dr. King, I follow your lead, and I will continue to walk that road less traveled. To stand for what I hold to be true. The road where one must seek justice, love mercy and walk humbly with our God (Micah 6:8). The road where I may not be favored by man, but honored by God. The road that can at times seem lonely but knowing that every step is ordained. Letting the love of God so penetrate me that my words are bright and my mind is slow to anger because anger only brings folly (Proverbs 14:29). I cannot bring this solution myself, but I can pray. I can stand on the word. And I can be there to pray and encourage those around me... one step at a time!

I pray that my life can be one bringing glory to the Lord in word and in deed. I don't want to just write these things down, I want to live them. And as I reflect today on your life, MLK, I see a man not of perfection but with a heart for the things of God. That is an example I can run with... even if the road gets bumpy.

A Journey None the Less

For those of you who have been following my journey with some health issues, the end of this blog will serve as an update for you. But first, for those who don't know what's been going on, a little bit of back story...

Around two and a half years ago I started having some issues with cramping in my left side. I shrugged it off because it was annoying but not detrimental to my life. Six months later I was sent by my employer to get a physical and the doctor informed me that she could feel some swelling and a lump in what she thought could be my ovary. Of course no body wants to hear that especially someone without insurance at the time. Within a month of that appointment pain started increasing  and the frequency of how often I was cramping grew. It was no longer annoying, it was beginning to keep me from functioning normally. I knew I needed to figure out some insurance, and so I started on that journey about a year in and let me tell you it was not easy. After a long and quite obnoxious trail of paperwork and circles of conversations with people, I was finally approved for insurance in April of 2015 that would kick in starting a few months after that.

All during this time of waiting and praying my symptoms got worse and some others were even added to the list. I was overwhelmed, worn out and just wanting to be healthy. I met with my doctor and explained all the things that had been happening (cramping, fevers, menstrual issues, headaches, nausea, etc) and he scheduled me with a Women's Specialist pretty quickly. I was excited to see the specialist because to me that meant answers were coming... little did I know.

My first meeting with the specialist was one of THE MOST horrific days of my life. Sounds dramatic? It was! I will spare you the details, but let's just say while she was examining me we found that my body parts just didn't want to cooperate and that led to a LOT of pain!!!! I don't even have words for the pain. Not only was it painful but it didn't bring any answers AND the Women's Specialist was rude and communicated with me like I was some moron. You know what I'm talking about, right? When someone talks down to you and makes you feel like your questions are unimportant... whew, some forgiveness had to happen there, let me tell you!

From there we began with blood test and urine tests and then some more blood tests... it seemed to be a never ending cycle. I was getting no answers and just felt like a hamster on a wheel going round and round and round. In the midst of all this testing I started getting migraines. Can I just tell you, I was done. Literally over it. My extrovert personality and love for ministry suffered... I did nothing but go to work and come home and sleep. I wore sunglasses all the time because my eyes were so sensitive to light that it would immediately trigger a migraine. I was running a low grade fever pretty much everyday and still, there were no answers. I couldn't laugh because it hurt my head, I couldn't read because it hurt my head and I couldn't sing because... well, it hurt my head. And I was NOT happy about it!

At this point the migraines became a priority to figure out, but I was sent for an ultrasound of my pelvic where they found that there were many cysts forming and several cysts that had burst in my ovaries. So I had an answer, without a solution. They put me on pain meds to try to manage the cramping and then we began the cycle of testing all over again but now for the migraines. All my blood work came back normal except my vitamin d, which was pretty much non existent. I was started on a prescription high dose of vitamin d to get that number right. They did eye tests on me, had me keep a journal of my day to see if anything out of the norm was affecting me and finally I was sent to get a CAT Scan of my head. The day of the scan I had a pretty normal (for me at the time) migraine, but when we got the results there were no abnormalities in my brain. Even on the right side where I was feeling a ton of constant pressure. Back to square one and feeling more frustrated and overwhelmed as ever my doctor put me on a new med to try to ease some of the migraines.

It was here that I had this random thought about going to see the dentist. I mean, I hadn't been in a long time and I was now covered by insurance so why not add to the eight million doctor appointments I already had every week. :)

I knew going in to the dentist that the first thing they would say to me was that I needed to get my wisdom teeth out asap. I had heard that the last time I went to the dentist but was not covered for it so it didn't happen. And sure enough, as soon as they took the first X-rays the dental assistant said "oh my, those things need to come out!" But guess what, my insurance still wouldn't cover it. In that same dental appointment the dentist said to me that there was a lot going on with my teeth and asked if I had been having headaches. I almost cried because it seemed too easy that it could be my teeth causing these issues in my head. So I took to my doctor the information that the dentist had given to see if there would be a way to have my health insurance cover the extraction of my wisdom teeth and the root canals that needed to take place. My doctor said he would contact the insurance company.

So that brings us to the most recent part of this journey of mine. About a month and a half ago I was laying on the couch feeling terrible of course, when I bit down and had a harsh pain. When I opened my mouth I had half of a tooth that had broken off. I could have cried. I should have cried lol, but instead I just added it to the list. I had to deal with it, because I couldn't eat. So that Monday I went to work, told my wonderful boss that I was going to have to see the emergency oral surgeon at Highland Hospital and I wasn't sure what was going to happen or when I'd be back to work. Bless her heart.

Highland got me in fast and said all that I suspected they would say, "these have to go". They had to remove my broken molar and the wisdom tooth that was right next to it. Due to the roots of my teeth being SUPER crooked and big they had to break the teeth up using a drill. Because of this, my jaw was fractured. Are you cry laughing yet? Try living this real life story! Oye!

I couldn't talk, couldn't eat, was in a ton of pain in my head from the pain in my mouth and jaw. If I never was a mess before, I was certainly one now. The surgeon said the other 3 wisdom teeth had to come out too but they couldn't do them all that day so they scheduled me to come back 3 weeks later. I missed almost 2 weeks of work trying to recoup and getting myself to the place I could talk again... but I made it through.

When it came time for my second surgery I was convinced of two things: 1) I hated teeth problems lol and 2) this WAS going to help my head. I mean I was convinced. I had people praying with me that this "problem" would become the solution and I would be able to move forward with life. I went in with HIGH expectations and I wasn't budging from that position.

The surgeon said to me at the beginning of the surgery that he wasn't sure he'd be able to get all three teeth out that day and he may only be able to do 2... in my head I cancelled out that plan of the enemy and said NOPE! All 3 are coming out today. lol I told you I was DE-TERM-INED! He began with the top right tooth and pulls it out whole. As soon as it came out I felt this pop of relief from pressure that was being caused by the tooth hitting the nerve. That was one hallelujah! Two more to go. He moved to the bottom right and of course, just as the previous surgery on the bottom opposite side, they had to drill it because my root was too dang crooked and the tooth was the largest he'd ever seen. What comes with drilling my teeth into bits? Another fracture to my jaw.

When he finished dealing with that part of my mouth he said to me, "well, would you like me to try for the third one? or do you want to come back?" If only he could have read my mind right then... again I say Oye! lol

I told him go ahead (in the most non-understable way you can while you have a numb mouth and dental tools in there). He got the tooth prepared to pull out whole and warned me that it was going to hurt in my cheek because the roots were so on top of the nerve (or something like that) and he couldn't numb that close to my ear. So I braced for impact! He started pulling and I immediately knew what he meant... it hurt, a freaking lot! I clenched my fists but the more he pulled the more pain and pressure I felt in my ear. He asked if I wanted him to stop and I said NO!!!! I was sobbing and hyperventilating and screaming. Right before he got the tooth out it felt like my ear drum was going to explode. I thought for sure I was going to go deaf... who knew you could feel like that when at the dentist?

The tooth came out and again I felt this huge pop of pressure in my head. And then I knew, I was right! I gathered my composure, calmed my breathing and took a pretty gnarly picture of the two teeth that were still whole. I was so anxious to get out of there that the dentist had to chase me down to give me back my sunglasses that I had left behind. I got home and spent the next two weeks resting and healing. My jaw is still not fully healed and so I can't eat normal food yet. And I do still have to go back to get several root canals done. But I am so excited and happy to let you know that I have been migraine free for 3 weeks. I stopped my migraine medicine about two and a half weeks ago and have only had a slight headache once or twice, but I can tell it's from a stiff neck from resting in bed so much and not from the same kind of pain as before.

I am literally so pleased! And so grateful. There were many people in my life that had to deal with a me that was not really me for the last ten-ish months. I've been a hermit locked away just trying to survive and that is the complete opposite of me! I can't thank the Lord enough for that silly broken molar... don't ever doubt that the Lord will use terrible situations to bring about good!

Now that my mind feels so free to be me again, I feel I can put some more effort and prayer into figuring out how to deal with the cysts and the bursting of the cysts in my ovaries. You know pain like that almost seems minute when your brain has been hurting so much and you haven't been able to think or function like a real human being. But I will not settle for only partial healing in my body! I am believing that the Lord has a plan to bring complete restoration to me and that I will be able to move forward in loving Him and loving His people.

When I set out to write this blog I did not intend it to be a novel, but I just felt like this portion of my journey needed to be shared. So I am sorry it is the longest thing ever lol But please, rejoice with me! For our God is great and greatly to be praised! His faithfulness is astounding and I want the world to know that it's been a crazy journey, but it's been a journey none the less. And every journey has a beginning and an ending... don't give up if you're in the middle of one right now!

Identify Me

Tonight as I was watching some good ole "Fixer Upper" on HGTV a commercial came on that triggered a thought that has now prompted this post. With all the craziness this country, and world, have been going through lately I feel like this is a timely reminder. So let me share the commercial with you: Lezlie's Story

"I do feel like Ancestry gave me a sense of identity."

I felt a heaviness for us, as children of God, our Father and our Creator, not truly knowing who we are and thus not being able to walk in our true identity. There are so many things in this world that we could try to find our identity in: money, relationships, appearances, family, friends, ministries, careers, ethnicity/race, etc. And I find it is interesting timing to bring up the latter two in this list. With the #bluelivesmatter and #blacklivesmatter campaigns growing rampantly as the days pass, my heart is stirred to pray for both groupings of people to realize they don't need these hashtags for them to "matter" because they both matter already. These hashtags represent hurt and frustration but for the most part, it seems that people just want to be recognized and respected for who they are. The problem is that we think "we are ____" is our identity.

Why does identifying as a certain ethnicity mean you should be treated better or worse? Why does putting on a uniform identify someone as being perfect or having evil intent? We're all human, and we're all going to make human judgments and mistakes, that's why! One side says "you don't respect me because of this" and the other side responds back "I won't respect you because you don't respect me"... and we find ourselves in a whirlwind of a circle. Shouting the same hurtful things back and forth. What comes of it? More hurt. More disrespect. More hate. Is that what we really want our identities to be wrapped up in? I want to challenge us as a nation, as human beings, to not accept that as truth!

When Jesus came to earth to offer us a way out of sin and bondage, He knew His identity. He was firm in who He is. He is the Name above every name. And yet, when men were spitting in His face and placing a crown of thorns on His head and eventually hanging Him on the cross He did not say "Don't you know who I am? Don't you understand that I am the King of Kings?" In fact, in His love for us and the humility in His heart He said "Father forgive them for they know not what they do.(Luke 23:34)"

Wow... how powerful is that? Jesus was so firm in His identity that He did not need to call out for recognition or respect in a time when the world was against Him but He called out for OUR freedom! Whew, I need a moment there to process that!

Can we learn from Jesus' example? Can we push aside selfish and prideful mindsets, accept our identity as children of God and love those around us? Can we at least try? The enemy obviously does not want us to know who we truly are and so he will do anything he can to bring disunity and hate.  But I know that the more we pursue a relationship with the Lord the better we will understand our true identity and the better we can love. The more we love, the better we learn to respect each other. And the more love and respect we have, the better our world will be. And I am ready to live in a world that is a reflection of Heaven on earth rather than just trying to survive a world that is hell on earth. It's time for us to let the Lord show us who we are and walk it out! Let's do this!

Lord, tonight my heart is stirred for Your children to allow You to identify them, us! Help us to see who You created us to be and to carry out the love You have called us to walk in. I am believing for a reviving of Your children and a revelation of our identities. May we see each other the way that You see us... not as black or blue, or tall or short, or even loud or quiet, but as chosen and loved. Burn off the chains of hate that bind that hearts of our nation and world and cut off the enemies plans to bring destruction and disunity. Let Your Kingdom come and Your will be done on earth as it is in Heaven! Amen!!!